On Death

Death, well it depends, you know. It depends whether death is taking any of my loved ones 😦  or it’s me 😉

So if it’s one of my loved ones than it brings the hell inside me. It’s a great loss for me, maybe the greatest of the losses. It brings absurdity, cause I know if someone died s/he’s gone, I mean imagine for a second, someone you love is gone forever and ever, I won’t be seeing her/him anymore.

And  I know, and I know it very well, “Why” so many people believe in some sort of life after death in one way other, clearly than ever before, especially after the death of grandma.  I didn’t want to see her face, I was just trying to be “rational” that what good it’ll bring by just seeing her for one last time but than I realised it’s the last chance I have to see her, I won’t be able to see her anymore. I had already lost my chance to talk to her for the last time, and now whenever I’m going to my uncle’s home, I miss her, she always used to sit in a corner in hall just outside her room, or in mid of the open hall, so I can barely go there and not remember her. Surely we had our differences but she was once a dear one, as I said before. Even though I wasn’t a dear one for her. But now she is gone and gone forever.

Being atheist seems great idea to live by, maybe the best one but there are loopholes in the theory as in every Other way of living a life. The death is the only thing that brings highest level of absurdity in my life.
And “My death”… Well

I have always  wanted to live before I die. So many things I have done and still feels like sooooo much is left to do. One minute I’m all ready to die and the other minute I’ll be ready to do any shit to betraying the death for some time. But you know… Cella Vie. That’s fucking life…

Any Road here’s my definition of living.

A person should must have lived up to  many many many experiences, including but not limited to,  the experience of the joy of not feeling the burden of any cage whatsoever, like the cage of time punctuality, burden of  unwanted responsibilities,

  • The feeling of exploring a new culture, customs and traditions.
  • The joy of being on hunger for some time,  the joy of eating like an elephant.
  • The joy of getting things done for someone without the feeling of  disappointment of being recognised for what you did.
  • The pain of being rejected from your loved one and the great pleasure of being a wanderer.
  • Taking responsibility for the entire humanity and than working for that as days and nights doesn’t matter.
  • And than quiting your work all of sudden realising that your efforts were being manipulated for some other purpose and not for the reasons you were working for.
  • Being friends for the stranger for a very short sphere of time and than never trying to get in touch even though you have shared contacts and stuff.
  • Wasting your days and nights for someone and than when you just get up, forgetting that someone special for the time being and than feeling great pleasure remembering her/him.
  • Being on the wrong track deliberately just to test, whether it’s the wrong way or not.
  • Experiencing all sorts of feelings and and reading all sorts books and than watching all sorts of movies and dramas and documentaries and fuck knows what…
  • Keeping in touch with a few friends, and forgeting about the rest of the world.

And the countless other experiences like waking up in a completely new city where you arrived just last night.

Basically everything that makes you realize you are fucking human not some programmed-Japanese-Robot, you know.

Well that’s what life is for me. What you think of the life in general and what experiences you would like to add in the list. Share them in the comments below and I’ll write another article on the same topic with  another perspective. So stay tuned love birds.


1 thought on “On Death

  1. fatimanaqvis

    da title Death attracted me to read it but eventually figured out ets more about life than death 🙂 – liked da definitions of living especially: Being on da wrong track deliberately just to test, whether ets da wrong way or not.



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